THE ECHO

by Eva Pearson

Right off the bat when I stepped into freshmen year English 9 Honors, I knew I was in for a wild ride. The way that Mr. Caulton just sat there… menacingly. I knew he was plotting something, and recruiting me to his newspaper staff was exactly that.

After being a part of The Echo for three years, two of which I was a managing editor, I have studied Mr. Caulton’s every move, word, and the snacks he keeps in that giant drawer attached to his desk. While I was writing news stories as my coverup, I have secretly been placing together the blocks as to why Mr. Caulton is not only beefing with me but is also in his FLOP ERA.

1) He does not appreciate Gen-Z humor.

You would think that as a freshmen teacher, he would study up on what his students would be joking about… right? Well, wrong. Many times I have shown up to lighten up seventh period, I have gotten shut down or heckled by this man. I think because of his millennial humor, he can’t process how funny I can be. He can’t process my “vibe’ because he’s too “shook” because he can’t understand my “clap backs” (I had to look up terms that a millennial would understand).

2) He doesn’t appreciate my decorations.

My section of the newspaper lab is decorated to the T with past news stories I’ve written, student issue recognitions, and my McLovin tapestry. The Super Bad tapestry sits at the top of my section of the wall and everyone on staff has praised it, calling it a funny and iconic piece; however, Mr. Caulton does not agree. When I first displayed it before winter break, I immediately got notice from the boss that it needed to be taken down. I was being CENSORED. I was told that writing for our newspaper that I could express myself. Clearly not.

3) His fashion sense.

I think I have seen Mr. Caulton wearing the exact same sweatshirt every day. I don’t think I need any further explanation.

4) His classroom curriculum consists of mainly GeoGuessr and Chess.

I would say that most students come to school each day to learn and prepare for their futures. For Mr. Caulton’s students, they learn how to prepare for chess matches to the death and where to go if they are ever stranded in the middle of Europe. If there was a Rate My Professor for Avon High School teachers, Mr. Caulton would not be under the English Department section, he would be in the “Conspiracy Theories and Tactical Survival” section, right between Bear Grylls and the guy who insists Shakespeare wrote coded messages about aliens.

5) He is going to make me miss The Echo.

The one thing I wanted to promise myself when I left high school was that I was not going to miss it that much. I wanted to feel that I could leave it all in the past with a few good, faint memories here and there. As graduation day approaches, I have had time to ponder on some of my best memories and quite a few have come from the newspaper. Through Mr. Caulton’s class, I have learned so much and met so many new people. Although I have experienced both the ups and the downs during my time on staff, I would never trade this experience for any other. I don’t really know what I am going to do without being able to explain the next big internet meme to Mr. Caulton and him being flabbergasted by our generations’ humor. So, in summary, I think that Mr. Caulton is ultimately in his flop era because he is losing a great group of seniors who are going to miss him very much.